I Remember ... We All Do!

It was a typical day at the office. My job at LifeWay involved developing presentations for church clients, and I was diligently working away on the most recent topic when my boss, Mike Priest, came down the hall looking for a TV. When he popped into my office, he said, "The World Trade Center has just been hit by a plane." In my disbelief, I responded, "Mike, that's not funny." He went to say that his wife, Carolyn, had called and that he wasn't joking. I called Stephanie and told her the news. She hadn't seen it and tuned in to see what was going on.

Across the hall, Wayne Poling offered his TV. Reception was not the best on our floor, but we managed to get a clear enough picture to then see the second tower hit, people jumping from the towers, and then the two towers collapse. It was an awful day. Work came to a screeching halt; eventually I called it a day and went home.

On the way home, I called home and Stephanie and I talked about the day's events. We agreed on what and how we would tell our children. When I got home, the TV was still on, and Stephanie and I watched the news in horror, fear, and shock. It was almost surreal. The building that I had once been in, enjoying an amazing view of one of the world's greatest cities was now just rubble and history. By then, two other planes had been cited, one damaging part of the Pentagon and the other wrecking in Pennsylvania.

We gathered our children in the living room and we told them that some bad men wanted to hurt our country. We explained that they had overtaken planes and had driven them into the buildings. We didn't have all the answers to their questions. But as best as we could, we comforted them and explained that God was still in control. We ended our family meeting with prayer for our country, the families of those who had been injured and killed, and the safety of all of us here.

Over the next few weeks, all we could do was stay glued to the TV and radio. We could not get enough. What? Who? Why? How? All questions unanswered then, but eventually answered over time. Planes had been grounded, rental car companies were out of cars given to people trying to get home, and we knew that life, as we once knew it, would never be the same.

I remembered back to my childhood and my grandparents and dad talking about the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. I remember, even 40 years later, the horror in their voices and the gasps in their words. It, like 9/11 for us, changed their generation forever.

The real heroes of 9/11 were those who took control of that plane intended for Washington, DC. The heroes were those police officers and firefighters who risked their lives to save the lives of others. The heroes were those family members who survived the devastation of the loss of their loved ones.

As a nation, we're resilient. We survive. We persevere. This would be no different. Ten years ago today, we remember ... remember the horror and devastation, and the lives that were lost to the anger of a group of people who wanted to hurt innocent people. But also the lives that we can celebrate who were saved because they arrived late to the office, or like the husband of my friend, Cheryl. Sam escaped death by volunteering to get everyone breakfast for his morning meeting at the WTC.

Today, even with that horror fresh in my mind, I am grateful to live in the greatest country in the world. Yes, we have problems, but as a nation, we come together in a crisis. I'm very glad that we have been so blessed.

Will you take a few moments to remember? I remember ....

A Little More Than You Want to Know?!

Recently reconnected to an old college friend through FaceBook, I got inspired to do a Google search on her. My former college friend is now a Personality Trainer and an author. And Danita is mighty good at what she does! You can read about Danita by clicking HERE.

When we were friends at Oral Roberts University back in the 1980s, she actually introduced me to my first serious girlfriend, Shauna. For some reason, I was the "token male" at an intimate birthday party for a mutual friend, Cheshire, where we all had a blast. Needless to say, Shawna and I didn't work out (because I married Stephanie), but after all these years, Danita and I have reconnected and are enjoying remembering a little about the past, but more importantly, sharing what's going on with us in the present.

Reading Danita's blog got me thinking about what people know about me. Yes, most know that I'm in real estate and that I was once married and that I have two kids (one is a senior and one is a sophomore in high school). But do you really know me? After a very messy divorce, I made the choice to become guarded. Fortunately, over the last few months and weeks, I've been challenged by friends to let that guard down a little. So, here goes ....

- I like peanut Skippy Natural Peanut Butter right out of the jar. In fact, I've always had my "own" jar. Never used for sandwiches or peanut butter and crackers, it's exclusively for eating with a spoon. I like it best with organic skim milk that I've mixed with Hershey's Syrup.

- I live in a condo in Franklin, TN. It's the modest part of town. Convenient to downtown Franklin, I walk to the Starbucks at Five Points for a Skinny Vanilla Latte on cold winter Saturdays, sometimes when it snows, or on rainy holidays like today. I always have a scone with my latte, and while there, I peruse The Tennessean to find out what the local headlines say.

- I didn't choose real estate as a career; it chose me. Our family moved to Middle Tennessee in 2000 so I could take a job as a ministry consultant at LifeWay Christian Resources (no, not the store) and loved it. The church pastors and staff that I worked with were phenomenal people. After leaving LifeWay, I didn't know what I wanted to do, but I did know that I didn't want to work for anyone else. Real estate became the natural choice after talking with my former agent, Jan Page (she's the broker at the Crye-Leike Hendersonville, TN office).

- I love rain because it feels cleansing to me. The music of the rain in the morning seems to clear away any low times I may have been experiencing, and sets the tone for a brighter day ahead.

- As a kindergartner and first grader, my best friend was David Shearon. David's family moved to Laurinburg, NC when I was six and I cried over that. We visited them in Laurinburg a few times, then they moved to South Florida. The Shearons came by to visit once when I was about 14, but I wasn't home, so I missed them. With the invention of the internet and advent of FaceBook and Craigslist, I've been trying to find David, but no luck so far.

- I was never a morning person until I married to Stephanie in 1988. She taught me how to be more disciplined from the first part of the day until the last part of the day. I miss her stability like that and her confidence in me.

- My mother-in-law died of lung cancer in 2003. Losing her was like losing my own mother. She and I were alike in personality - outgoing, enjoyed people, etc. We were very close and I'm very glad that I had a wonderful relationship with her and that my children knew her before she passed away.

- I've lived in seven metropolitan areas as an adult: Tulsa, Richmond, Chicago, Erie (PA), Virginia Beach, Jacksonville (FL), and Nashville. The two places I'd love to live: Dallas (TX) and San Diego (CA), but they're too far away from my children. My favorite place? Jacksonville, FL because I love the ocean.

- On my Dream List: backpacking across Europe. If I couldn't backpack, I'd take a European trip and stay in hotels. Either would be fine. Another dream? To own my own restaurant in an old church building. It would be fine dining, so to speak, but with really great menu items, some of which were passed down from relatives. Other things on my Dream List: write a book, go to law school, and start a charity for divorced parents who have suffered at the hands of the courts.

- The best chocolate chip cookies I've ever eaten are from a recipe that Stephanie and I tweaked. She got it from the mom of a childhood friend. Everyone loves them. And the best chocolate pie in the world is the one that my mother makes. The recipe is from Peggy Shearon, our next door neighbor when I was about five or six back in Williamsburg, VA.

- I like to cook, and I'm pretty good at it, but don't like to cook for just me. When I do, I cook enough for multiple meals and take leftovers for lunch. Leftovers are much better than sandwiches or eating out.

- My kids (Annie and Hunter) are my proudest accomplishments. I've always told them that if I had to pick out any kids for the "Kid Grocery Store" that I'd pick them out every time, no questions asked. I dream about them about three or four times a week.

- When in college, I changed my major seven times. I started with Accounting and ended there, too, but experienced communications, biology, chemistry, marketing, music, etc. all along the way. If I had it to do all over again, I would have taken a break from college for a year to work, then would have returned to major in Marketing with a minor in Communications.

- Seven years ago, a friend challenged me. He said, "Jack, you have such high expectations that you are robbing yourself of joy." I didn't like the comment, but I seriously contemplated it. The next day I began my "Gratitude List". At first I didn't think I could list even 50 items over a lifetime, but I had that many within the first 10 minutes. They flooded out of me. I now have about 2000 things on my list. That list keeps me going because it's a constant reminder that God is in charge and that I can always have hope.

- I play several instruments, and enjoy playing piano the most. I haven't played in a while because I don't have a piano any more. My favorite piano I've ever owned was a baby grand that was in our living room. Hunter can play by ear, but Annie and I play solely by note. And, no, I won't play for your wedding, your Christmas party or your dinner. My piano teacher (Mrs. Garrison) was always on my case because she said I had loads of talent, but wouldn't practice enough.

- If I could do any job without getting paid, I'd do what I'm doing now - real estate. I love it that much, but have to get paid to live. I miss the ministry, though, at times, but have no desire to go back to working on a church staff. One day I'll return, but in a different capacity.

- As a kid, I was intimidated by sports because I was awkward and gangly. My interests today are backpacking, hiking, camping, working out, swimming, and running. Notice they're all basically individual sports. In college I took backpacking five times, even though I only got credit for it twice. I also took volleyball, tumbling and trampoline, and badminton. Looking back, those were actually fun to play.

- I grew up in a dysfunctional family, but we've made it through those tough times. Looking back, they helped me to be a better man.

- My dad taught me two very significant things: (1) Never make a decision when you're down; (2) Always be the best you can be in business - offer the highest customer service. Those two things have helped me greatly in life.

- At 50, I'm looking forward to a tremendous decade. My forties were challenging, so I welcome the change. I now know that I know less now than I ever did!

- My best friend is Richard Landry. Richard lives in New England, but we've been friends since we were sophomores at ORU (age 19). Richard has a great heart and has always been a friend to me, no questions asked, even in the most difficult of times. While not typically confrontational, he's confronted me when I've needed it, and he's joined me in celebrating joys in my life.

- I work at Crye-Leike, Realtors in Brentwood, TN (the corporate office) because I believe in my company and love the professional service that we choose to offer. While other firms are closing their doors or merging, we are opening offices and are still selling more real estate than anyone around.

- My clients are wonderful - I have been truly blessed. Most are referrals these days where past clients I've had are sending me wonderful new ones. I love it when a client trusts me to help them with their largest investment. And I enjoy seeing the "light bulb" go on when they either sell their home or find the one they want to buy.

- Lastly, I'm learning not to ask God, "Why'd this happen?" but to ask, "What are you teaching me about You and/or myself through this?" It's really tough to ask those questions, and sometimes I don't like the answers, but I figure I need those experiences to grow.

Wow! Now you know a little more ... maybe too much?! Thanks, Danita, for inspiring me to do this!

Do You Know What Today Is?

In my list of crazy calendar days, today is "National Compliment Day". Who knows where this came from?! I sure don't. And it must be something to it because it can actually be found online. CLICK HERE for a quick link to the info on National Compliment Day.

Who can you compliment today? There's no doubt that everyone needs a compliment every now and then. Whether mean or nice, everyone can use a nice pick-me-up today.

Is there someone in your office or place of work who has done a great job? Or how about your son or daughter - are you proud of them? What about your spouse? Or a friend, parent or other relative?

And there is one additional person you need to compliment - yourself. How many times have you patted yourself on the back said, "Great job!"? Isn't it time?

Go out and have a great day today. Give someone that lift that they need. Maybe they'll pass it on.

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If you are looking for a person who is positive but realistic about real estate, give Jack a call at 615-260-3599. He'll help you with all of your real estate needs.

Thoughts About the Mid-Term Elections

Dear friends,

Our country is at a crucial crossroads and tomorrow will decide our future for the next many years.

Over the last several years we have bailed out banks and auto manufacturers, tried to bail out the housing industry, spent much more money than we could ever fathom in three lifetimes, and our Congress is at odds within itself, providing a very dim future for my children and grandchildren.

To be honest, very little of what has happened inside Washington beltway over the last few years has been productive. Americans are divided, Republicans and Democrats are blaming each other, people who want fiscal responsibility are getting a bad "rap", and nothing is being resolved.

American is not a perfect place, but after having personally seen destitute third-world countries where people have nothing, by comparison, we still live in the greatest country on this earth.

While I tend to be more far-right in my beliefs, the American people, in general, tend to be a little right of center. Our Congress no longer reflects the will of the people, so I am asking you, my friends, to vote tomorrow. Let's get America where she needs to be again by electing representatives who will guide us back toward where Americans stand.

Will everything ever be resolved? No. We are an imperfect people living in an imperfect country. But we can do our best. This is the time to vote, and then to make your thoughts and desires known to those who represent you.

When I lived in Davidson County, I contacted my congressional representative. That person was willing to meet with me privately, but was not willing to hold a town hall meeting to hear from the majority of his/her constituents. He/she said that no town hall meeting would be held because he/she wanted a "controlled environment". That tells me that the representative knew what the constituents wanted but was unwilling to hear us out. That representative voted in favor of a unpopular bill and now tries to uphold an image of a "friend of the people." That person is coming up for re-election and should be voted out.

The purpose of this letter is not to sway any of my friends to vote for a specific candidate, but it is to share that we DO NEED CHANGE! It is time to take a stand, America, and to take back our government. And if the ones we elect this time do not do the job, they need to be voted out the next time, too.

Until 2008, I was never an actively political man. However, after seeing the path that our country has taken, I firmly believe that ALL AMERICANS should take a stand for ourselves, our families, our homes, our jobs, our economy, and our freedom, as defined by the Constitution of the United States.

Sincerely,

Jack Jernigan

The Best Father's Day Gift

I've often wondered what the first Father's Day gift was back in 1910. Maybe it was a tie. Throughout the years, I've received my share of Father's Day gifts. Everything from ties to shirts to gift cards made the list, but this year, I received the best gift ever.

When I opened my gift, I discovered something so precious that I will treasure it forever. No, not a brick of gold, or a nice new watch, or anything material. It was a book. That's right - a plain, simple book. Once inside I saw photos of my children on every page accompanied by descriptive words about each of them. You see, Annie and Hunter are the most precious gifts that any dad could have. Since they were born I've told them over and over again, "If I had to go to the ______ year old grocery story, I'd pick you out every single time!" I said it then and I say it now. There is NO GREATER gift in this life than children.

When Annie was born in February of 1994, she was a little early. Prior to her birth, she was an active baby. Her mother and I thought sure she would be a boy because she continually kicked and rolled over. She was born after over 24 hours of labor and weighed in at 7 pounds, 13 ounces. Hunter, on the other hand, was a little quieter baby. He was big, though, at 9 pounds 3 ounces, and he was a late arrival - about a week late.

I'm proud of my children and and love them with all of my heart. I'm sure you think your kids are the best, but I have to disagree -- mine are! And everyone says so! If you could get to know them, you'd see that they argue and fight sometimes. Annie tries to "steamroll" over Hunter, but he doesn't let her do that too often. He stands up for himself. But he has a much more tender heart. Hunter is more compassionate while Annie is a confident leader.

When I became a dad back in 1994, it was one of the greatest events in my life. And it happened again for a second time in November of 1995. Two great kids and the wonderful blessings that they bring. I'm so grateful ............

The True Spirit of Christmas

If you haven't taken your children to see Santa Claus yet, there's still time! In spite of economic downturns, job losses and a host of other challenges in our world today, Santa is still the beacon that all is right in the world at Christmas time.

When I was a child, I couldn't understand why we'd see Santa at so many places. My little mind thought that Santa was able to jump from department store to department store, and that he did it just in time for me to see him there. It wasn't until later that my mother, in her hopes of extending my make-believe world, told me that Santa has "helpers" to help him talk with all the kids because he was busy making the toys at the North Pole.

Sometimes today, I wonder if I know the "real" Santa. If not, he's mighty close. Last year, I met Santa Dick at Green Hills Mall working a seasonal job at the mall, and there we became friends.

Over the last year, I've had the opportunity to get to know Santa Dick. He epitomizes what Christmas is all about. Adults and children alike love this wonderful Santa because he genuinely cares about the children (and, yes, adults) that he meets.

Santa Dick recently told me about a little girl he met who understood the real meaning of Christmas. "I just want some balloons for Christmas," she answered when Santa Dick asked her what she wanted. When asked why she just wanted balloons, she told Santa Dick, "So other children who don't have toys can have my toys." Needless to say, by the end of that story, I choked up. That little girl, at her young age, understands Christmas!

How many of us really understand the true meaning of Christmas? I wonder how our economic recession has affected what we give this year. Maybe it's not as much or as expensive as we've given in the past. And that's good. It's time for us to slow down and just love and care about each other.

Do you know what the first gift of Christmas was? It was a baby, lying in a manger, who was born to take away the sins of the world. That unconditional gift is for every single person who ever lived before then, during that time, and since that time. It's for you and for me. Santa Dick would echo these same sentiments.

There's time to go see Santa ... and there's time for us to understand the real meaning of Christmas.

Merry, merry Christmas to all of you! May you be exceptionally blessed this Christmas.

Do You Remember?

I'll never forget that fateful day eight years ago. Sitting in my office at LifeWay, working away, my boss came down the hall, gathering everyone in front of the closest TV. Mike's wife had just called and told him that the WTC had been hit by a plane. When he told us, I was in disbelief.

Needless to say, what followed was another crash into the other tower, a plane crash into the Pentagon, and another one in Pennsylvania. I couldn't believe it. What was bad at the beginning had gotten far worse. We were actually under attack!

Watching the news that day, I sat there with chills running down my spine. My memory flashed back to stories my grandmother had told me about Pearl Harbor's attack and the fear that she felt. Never in my lifetime did I ever think we would not be safe in the U.S.

That night, we told our children about the attacks and reassured them that they would be safe. Of course, Dad and Mom were there to protect them. At just 7 and 5, the images on the TV were more than they could understand. I'm sure they saw the concern on our faces as we watched the news most of the evening.

Today, memorial remembrances are being held all over the country for the 3000-plus people who died that day, all innocent victims of terrorists. As I watched the news this morning, I thought about how our family would have been affected had I, or our children's mother, had died in one of those situations. Work took me to various places where I had to fly, and it could have been me on one of those airplanes.

My purpose today is not to dredge up the frightful memories of that horrific day. Instead, I want to remind us to be grateful for our lives, for the country we live in (regardless of what we disagree with), and for our families. God has richly blessed us and while we struggle with differences between us, we still live in the best country in the world.

As you go through the day, why not take a few minutes to pause and pray for those who lost loved ones in those tragic events? And while you're at it, maybe say a prayer of gratitude for the blessings you have been given.

Coping with Burnout

During these economic times, burnout and stress are fairly common. I've seen stress on the faces of friends, and have even endured some stress myself. During these stressful times, I began to think about life and how challenging it can be. Without skills to cope with these everyday challenges, burnout can happen fast and furiously.

Ask yourself, "How do I know I'm burning out?" Look for these signs: (1) everyday seems like a bad day, and/or (2) you feel overwhelmed, bored or irritable at home or work. Most people just retreat from life or keep steaming ahead, but neither of these are remedies for burnout.

Here are some tips to cope with burnout:

- Build a support system. Plan a fun outing with family, friends and/or co-workers. Cultivating real relationships can make you feel connected to others and help reduce stress.

- Try to add fun to your daily work life. Stay positive and find humor in stressful situations. Most of the time, things that happen probably won't matter a year from now.

- Create a calm space. Find a stress-free zone at work or at home. Sitting quietly for a few minutes can improve your mood and refresh you for the next challenge.

- Be kind to yourself. While it's easier to be critical of yourself, make it a habit to focus on your own positive and favorable attributes.

Reducing stress, the cause of burnout, can impair your health. Constant tiredness, difficulty sleeping, and unexplained aches and pains are all signs of stress. You may want to see your physician. In the meantime, take care of yourself and make some changes.
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I care about each of my clients personally. If you're looking for an agent who also cares about helping your sell your current and/or helping you buy a home, then give me a call.

Facebook Friends

Last summer I heard about all the hoopla about Facebook, so I checked it out. I established my page and it wasn't too long before I heard from a former math student of mine. We chatted and laughed about old times. Then other students found me. Then business associates. Then friends from church. And kids I grew up with. Even my sister (who's not computer savvy) joined. (In the pic at left are Nicole Ciner Baker, Jack Jernigan, and Tina Gilreath Pollard. Nicole and Tina were in my math class my first year of teaching in 1985.)

Never a substitute for interpersonal relationships, Facebook has become "connection central" for so many. It's wonderful to reconnect with other people, rekindling old relationships, and to find new ones. I have been blessed.

Probably one of the greatest blessings from Facebook has been reconnecting with former students. As a young, first-year teacher at New Kent High School near Richmond, Virginia, I had a desperate need to succeed. Being 23 with an 18-year-old appearance didn't help me to convey the serious demeanor I tried to possess.

A few months ago I received a Facebook invite to a New Kent High School Facebook Reunion at The Tobacco Company in Richmond. I was the only teacher there. It was great to see Tina, Karen, Stuart, Jeff, Shelly, Nicole, Wendy, Donna, and other students I taught in Math class. Tina loves to tell the story about her last day of her senior year. She had been late so many times that I sent her to In School Suspension (ISS) to serve out her sentence. We laughed and laughed about that. And we're still laughing about it.

Yes, those were good times. And while it's been great to enjoy reconnecting with people on Facebook, I enjoy the people I connect with every day. My family, friends and clients mean the world to me. You all are very special and I'm glad I know you. I'm also glad that you impact my life in so many positive ways. For this, I am very grateful.

To My Mom - Happy Mother's Day!

She has never served on a board of directors, flown in a space shuttle, or even worked in a hospital. But she has impacted the lives of more people than even the greatest of the great. This great lady is our mother, Betsy Olive Jernigan.

Growing up on a tobacco farm in Garner, North Carolina (now a suburb of Raleigh), mom picked tobacco, sorted through the leaves to remove the tobacco worms, bundled leaves together, and even hung them in the tobacco barn to dry. While it wasn't the most fun job, she endured it and today she is thankful for what farm life taught her. In turn, she has taught my sister, Susan, and me to work hard and to stick out tough times.

While growing up, Susan and I knew, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that our mother loved us. She raised us to believe that loyalty was essential in relationships, that we needed to do our best in all things, and to love people beyond ourselves. She also taught us that Christianity was real and that trusting God, regardless of what the circumstances appeared to be, was worth it in the long run.

After high school, mom earned her business degree from Mars Hill College in the Blue Ridge Mountains in western North Carolina. After graduation, she was recruited to First Baptist Church in Suffolk, Virginia (near Virginia Beach) where she met and married our dad. Not long after, I came along, then Susan followed a few years later.

Mom could have worked all of her married life, but she chose to stay home with us. Whenever we got home, we knew she would be there, waiting for us. We had a steady supply of cookies and Kool-Aid for friends who came over, and she always welcomed others into our home.

Eventually she did go to work - as a preschool teacher, a church secretary, and a high school guidance registrar. And when she finally retired, we were all moved to tears as the testimonies of friends and family revealed her true character.

Other people have noticed the imperfection in her upper lip, but what they don't know is that she was born with a cleft lip and palate. She endured 14 surgeries at Duke University Hospital prior to age 21 in the days when reconstructive surgery was not what it is today. Susan and I never noticed the imperfection until we were much older. What we did notice was her unconditional love for us and her desire to teach us how to live.

Our mother taught us to be strong and courageous, to be loyal no matter how much it cost us, to love people beyond ourselves, to take time for others, and to put God first in all things. For me, her life lessons have paid off.

As a grandmother to our children, Annie and Hunter, and to Susan's and John's daughter, Caroline, Mimi (as she is affectionately known) is the epitome of grandmotherhood. She loves spending time with her grandchildren, always listening to them and talking with them. At 72, she still plays with Caroline and "hangs out" with Annie and Hunter. All three of them get excited when they get to go to Mimi's house, looking forward to being with her.

While our mom has taught us great lessons in life, I believe the greatest lesson is that she loved our dad through thick and thin. And it was the greatest gift she could have ever given us. Thanks, Mom! Happy Mother's Day! We love you.

A Lasting Legacy

Our pastor's message yesterday prompted me to think about the future. Not just about 'who gets what' when I leave this world, but about the legacy I would leave my children.

During his message on "Leaving a Legacy" in yesterday's service, Phil Wilson asked if anyone had been impacted by someone else (who is now deceased). Immediately my thoughts raced to my grandmother, Annie Maude Brock Jernigan. As kids, my sister, Susan, and I called her "Gaga". As teenagers, we shortened her name to the cooler form, "Gags".

Gags was a very happy lady. Overweight most of her life, she was the model grandmother for the 1960s and 1970s. Along with her rounded body, she sported swollen ankles that puffed out of the top of her patent leather low-heeled shoes, silver horn-rimmed glasses and that ever popular blue-white hair. All of that was set off by a starched dress that was belted at the waist. She was a product of her generation, looking a little older than she really was.

She was a jolly soul, and many times, when she wore her mu-mus, Susan and I would jump up in her lap, only to slide down her lap and legs, just like being on a playground slide. She had little round hands that would find their way to our cheeks. While she patted our faces, she would say, "God love you". She meant it. At every weekend visit, she would sit us down right next to her and ask us to tell her about US! She listened intently as though she was at the most important meeting in the world.

Summer vacations sent us packing all the way to Gags' house in Suffolk, Virginia. Even though Suffolk was not the hot spot of the state, Gags's house was a true vacation. She did anything we wanted and went anywhere we wanted to go. We ate hot dogs at Grunelwald's, roller skated up and down the sidewalk in front of her house, went to get ice cream cones from High's, played Solitaire and Aggravation, toured the city and the country, plummeted through old family photos while listening to Gags tell us stories of the "good old days", and fried up doughnuts made from biscuits out of a can.

Of course, these trips wouldn't be complete without having to go with her to church on Sunday mornings (we were there two weekends), visit my grandfather's grave, and watch her game shows and soaps ("The Price is Right", "The Young and the Restless", and "The Edge of Night") with her every day.

These memories really mean nothing to anyone else. But to me, they provided the luxury of a world that I could look forward to for at least one week every summer. The things we did together were not that significant, but the fact that we were loved beyond description did -- and still does!

Gaga was authentic, real, down-to-earth, courageous, unselfish, and she made everyone feel very special. When she died back in 1990, the church was full of people she had known for most of her life. Frequent comments after the service were, "She was a great lady", "Maude was a real Christian", "Maude walked the walk", and "You had such a fine mother and grandmother". Comments like those are fairly commonplace at southern funerals, but not this time. I knew, by the looks on those faces, that what they said was straight from their hearts.

She didn't have much money, and we always joked about her wrapping our Christmas gifts in white tissue paper with the edges sealed up with Christmas Seals. But we knew that she loved us and meant it every single time she said it. Gaga was as close to a real-life hero as anyone could be.

So what's my legacy going to be? When I eventually pass out of this life, what will I leave my children? Money? No. A great house? No. Tremendous investments? No. Those things just don't matter. What I hope to leave is their knowing that their dad loved them more than anything else in this world, that he meant what he said, that he was strong and courageous, that he stood up for what was right and what he believed in, and that he was a man who sought to live a life of integrity and honesty.

What legacy are you building for your loved ones today? Maybe you haven't thought about it. If you don't have children to leave a legacy to, there's someone's life you can impact - what about them? We all need heroes.